It’s flipping Saturday and there’s an early kid thing I have to do and I had every intention of pulling the hair back, minimally decorating the face, and skipping the shower til later. It would look like I came from the gym, I reasoned.
Then I saw myself in the mirror.
What the hell happened? There is no WAY I can get away with not showering this morning. Granted, I watched a weepy show before I went to sleep, and I had a weird dream, but nothing that should render me frightening and bloodshot and puffy and ready for my close-up at my zombie movie audition.
Perhaps, after I have attempted to rehabilitate my face, I shall plan my next installment: When Showering is Not an Option. It will be my breakthrough piece into the world of fashion publishing. Dry shampoo, floral body spray, jaunty hat and bright scarf for a pop of color. Boom.