For realsies

When Showering is not Optional January 26, 2013

Filed under: Hair,humor,life,Style — peachyteachy @ 8:40 am
Tags: , , ,

It’s flipping Saturday and there’s an early kid thing I have to do and I had every intention of pulling the hair back, minimally decorating the face, and skipping the shower til later.  It would look like I came from the gym, I reasoned.

Then I saw myself in the mirror.

What the hell happened?  There is no WAY I can get away with not showering this morning. Granted, I watched a weepy show before I went to sleep, and I had a weird dream, but nothing that should render me frightening and bloodshot and puffy and ready for my close-up at my zombie movie audition.

Perhaps, after I have attempted to rehabilitate my face, I shall plan my next installment: When Showering is Not an Option.  It will be my breakthrough piece into the world of fashion publishing.  Dry shampoo, floral body spray, jaunty hat and bright scarf for a pop of color.  Boom.



18 Responses to “When Showering is not Optional”

  1. rackofribs Says:

    You speak to me like Obi-wan Kenobi. I, too, have just attempted to wash off the night of the living dead before the early appointment thing, but failed. I even employed the big guns. Liquid eyeliner. Still, I am no more attractive than my sunrise zombie counterpart. Though, I look more like a hooker zombie now. And I am cleaner.

  2. WSW Says:

    Big old Jackie O sunglasses are the key. If anyone asks why you’re wearing them indoors, just say “prescription.” Works every time.

  3. rossmurray1 Says:

    Stop by Burkas ‘R’ Us on your way to your event.

  4. Katie Says:

    I gave up this morning. Had to wash the hair. Two days dirty is ok, but I was pushing three. Why do some mommies look so good with hair all twisted up and a tiny bit of lipstick, and I just look like an oily gremlin?

  5. Geez, most days even after a shower I look like I could hit up a zombie movie audition! Every time I watch a zombie movie or show I always wonder what the credentials are for it. Do you already have to know how to walk stiff legged with spaghetti arms or do they teach you that on the set?

  6. UndercoverL Says:

    I didn’t realize how bad my allergies to dogs were until last Saturday morning. I woke up after spending ten minutes petting one Friday night, and after looking at me my husband said “don’t forget your sunglasses this morning.” This was post-makeup application. :/

  7. javaj240 Says:

    There’s probably a “women’s” or a “teen” magazine that would pay you real money for the article you describe, LOL!

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