Number 3. Number 3. Number 3.

I love it when my friend calls to tell me she is coming to kidnap me to attend a surprise birthday party for another friend that I truly never see anymore. We are not going in time for the SURPRISE! thing, mostly because our merely showing up will be such a shock that we thought it would be best not to trigger any cardiac events.

I hate it when websites that I use all the time, to pay bills and such, announce that they are streamlining and making it all so much easier for me! The subtext of this is as follows:

“Hello! We really want you to have such a tough time navigating our new and improved website that when you get so frustrated that you give up, you will forget to pay your bill and we can assess a disproportionately large late fee, enabling us to pay our fabulous I T Department for having pissed off thousands of customers like you! ”

I love/hate it when I read one of those Daily Posts on the Freshly Pressed page, down below the Pressed people, and the topic is humor blogging. It was kind of suggesting that there are ways to be funny, and there are no-nos—things like not knowing how to pluralize the word “no-no.” There was allusion to a magical principle of comedy becoming more comedic with the deft application of the Golden Three, where the writer woos the reader by incorporating some version of concept repetition in threes. This may be true. I don’t know that I will build my humorous house on the idea. It makes me happy to write and make fun of crap that is not funny, often. I also enjoy writing about random stuff that I think is funny, but that most folks just don’t.

I love that I have found a handful of smart, funny bloggers who get a kick out of it too, sometimes. See how I wrote the word “funny” in the title THREE TIMES?! Hot damn! That WAS funny! I stand corrected, WordPress. Oh, and I apologize for not crafting a more cohesive and satisfyingly flowing blogpost here. Do I really need to discuss the website issue, or would it be less self-indulgent if I removed it?

I also apologize for the unsatiated feeling that you are having right now, due, no doubt, to the fact that I wrote FOUR “love, hate, love-hate, love” components. Be patient.