peachyteachy

For realsies

Fantastic Cheating Strategies OR Never, Ever Cheat April 17, 2012

Filed under: humor,Uncategorized — peachyteachy @ 8:12 pm
Tags: , ,

If you want to cheat at video games and the like, that’s actually pretty cool, right? I mean, I am pretty sure that an opponent of mine in Words with Friends is running some kind of fishy word generator, because his vocabulary has developed dramatically since I have been playing the game with him.That’s okay, I cheerfully meet his “vext” with “tan.”

Spring is in the air, after all, and along with it, the sweet aroma of tests, tests, and more tests–college finals, standardized exams, you name it. Like so many of us, I am catching the spirit of the creative cheatmasters of ages past! As an homage to the cheaters, I am offering a limited edition selection of what may be the two best cheat gadgets ever!

Cheat Genius #1: Silly Putty. Discreetly flatten Silly Putty or generic equivalent to your palm, then press it into the test document, thus recording the image of the question into the putty. Then, roll it up, scroll style, and slide it into your sleeve. Sell to your friends or to investigative journalists.  Preferably, for more than the cost of the putty.

Cheat Genius #2: Super Hard Tracing/Allergy Attack. Studiously “underline” passages from the test, pressing extra hard with your number two pencil, so as to make an imprint in the paper. Next, feign a sneezy, snotty allergy attack. Raise your hand and ask for tissues. Secretly suck up the snot into your brain instead of blowing your nose. Then, gently rub the newly dull pencil over the tissue, much like a leaf rubbing, creating an image of the text on the tissue. Casually wad up the tissue and tuck it into your pocket for future reproductions, which you will sell to your friends or to investigative journalists.

Just remember, cheaters never win. And winners never cheat. Happy testing!!

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